Any great love story has a point where fantasies begin to crumble, and the flaws start to become apparent.
After the thrill of adrenaline wears off, the toilet behaviors are revealed, the red-hot romance may simmer, and the "happily ever after" appears to be unfolding in a strikingly unexpected manner than you thought.
Strong respect, dedication, and
camaraderie stay unchanged in successful marriages years after the rose-colored
glasses vanish.
Yet, what transpires after the
honeymoon period after you uncover a new realm of abnormality and incompatibility?
Apparently, your partner contaminates
your sense of peace by making you anxious when you sense their footsteps
approaching.
Worst case scenario: your rationality
and safety are called into question. In other words, what if your relationship
turns dangerous?
Infidelity or an extramarital affair
The
relationship can be doomed when one person seeks fulfillment outside of the
partnership, particularly physical or sexual. When a spouse feels deceived, it
is incredibly complicated to regain their trust.
Extramarital
relations are why 20-40% of marriages break down and end in divorce. One of the
most prevalent reasons for divorce is infidelity. However, people's motives for
cheating aren't as simple as our rage would have us believe.
Betrayal is
frequently motivated by discontent and bitterness compounded by disparities in
sex drive and an absence of emotional resonance. According to Ruth Houston, a relationship expert, infidelity starts as a
fairly harmless friendship in most cases.
What begins
as a passionate relationship progresses to a sexual relationship. One of
the most common grounds for divorce is infidelity. Aside from being
separated and torturing your partner, it is also one of the statutory grounds
for divorce (cognitive or physiological).
Financial Insecurity
When a couple is not on the same
wavelength about managing their finances, it can escalate to disastrous
consequences. Why is financial disharmony the leading cause of divorce?
As per recent divorce statistics, a
"last straw" factor for divorce is an absence of economic congruence,
which accounts for about 41% of all divorces.
Everything from divergent buying
patterns and monetary aspirations to one spouse having significantly more money
than the other can stretch a marriage to hit rock bottom, resulting in a
fight for power.
Disputes in the amount of money one
spouse contributes into the marriage can also contribute to dominance issues in
the marriage.
You stop confiding in each other
Couples that have unsettled, ongoing
disagreement and a habit of low-grade antagonism even when they aren't arguing
lose sight of the other as a means of solace, love, or companionship rapidly.
They stop behaving like peers, such as
coordinating enjoyable activities, having faith in one another, expressing
their worries, or even discussing their day.
They shrink back, frequently out of fear of being shunned or harmed if they appear too weak.
There is a whole lot of disapproval
Your marriage may be in peril if you
roll your eyes more than a teenager at a humorous anecdote and speak to each
other sarcastically (no, not the clever John Oliver sort).
Lack of respect is frequently the
result of a breakup in a relationship—infidelity, concealment, or some other
offense.
It's difficult to recover from
contempt and hatred. It is unethical to approach your partner in a harsh,
vicious manner, and you should not be addressed in the same way. Thus, making your marriage work
with a discourteous approach is certainly not a way to fix a relationship.
There is potential if you are ready to
fight through the situation that is at the foundation of your distaste. But
keep in mind that you can't get rid of disdain without first figuring out what
caused it.
Escape fantasies kick in
People begin to experience
worthlessness when relationship tension is not handled and grows
progressively corrosive. You have no idea how things will turn out, and you
can't foresee a way forward.
As a result, instead of interacting,
you begin to consider other options for resolving the issue. Disengagement
appears to be the most common solution. Unfortunately, divorce isn't simple, and
most couples learn that the hard way.
You might begin to fantasize about how
different life would be if you lived separately. Holidays you'd undertake, how
you'd pass your time, how you'd parent by yourself.
Compared to the rage and despair they
feel about their marriage, these fantasies typically make couples feel a tiny bit
eager and enthusiastic.
If a relationship is in trouble,
spouses frequently seek milestones such as the children leaving the house as a
moment of freedom and liberty.
Others wait for favorable financial
conditions, such as a new job, a particular quantity of funds, or other
tangible assets, to materialize.
They are, nevertheless, ticking down
the days until the key is turned and the door swings open, leading to
liberation.
Absence of intimacy and romance
Becoming disconnected from your
partner can swiftly destroy marriage since it makes couples feel like they're
dwelling with strangers or are more like roommates than lovers.
This isn't necessarily about sex and
can stem from a dearth of physical or emotional bonds. Giving your spouse the
silent treatment regularly can destroy your relationship to the extent that it
leads to divorce in the long run.
Varying sexual urges and desires going
unaddressed are common problems for couples, and you whimper to yourself, "This
is not what I want out of
my marriage."
Furthermore, our sexual requirements
vary as we get older, which can contribute to emotions of bewilderment and
disappointment. Negating your partner's sexual needs has recently been
identified as the leading divorce trigger.
Both partners are responsible for
keeping the connection potent and meaningful. To improve your relationship,
practice small gestures of generosity, gratitude, and physical closeness as
much as needed.
Gaining weight
Gaining weight is one of the leading
causes of divorce, despite how trivial or unreasonable it may appear. Excess
weight is one of the top factors of divorce.
In certain circumstances, a
considerable degree of weight increase prompts the other partner to appear less
aesthetically attractive.
In contrast, weight gain has a negative impact on people's self-esteem, which can lead to sexual troubles and ultimately divorce.
Get the help you need
Arturo James Daly pitches towards couples who jump through hoops in finding solutions to save their marriage or are waiting to know when to divorce. To safeguard and sustain your marriage life from teething troubles in the present time and future, read "7 Ways To What Makes Love Last" by Arturo James Daly today!
Order here: https://us.amazon.com/Secrets-What-Makes-Love-Last-ebook/dp/B09HQ1WL4F
The book is also available in
Spanish:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09L32831S/ref=cm_sw_r_awdo_navT_a_3XP5WXHWD1B77YAHD1YY