Our parents used to write love letters, we wrote long texts, and the current generation swipes right. From plucking out a fresh rose from the garden for our beloved to sending heart emojis to our partner, love and its mode of expression have seen their fair share of advancements across the generations. Indeed, millennials are rightly crowned in accomplishments in various life disciplines, but it's a bit of a see-saw situation when it comes to doing justice with love.
The reason behind this is the excessive interference from the external forces in our personal lives and the individual stress we carry on ourselves to keep up with the rat race.
We look at some of the changes time has inflicted upon the dynamics of love.
Do you know that technology has influenced our lives? Yes, that was a rhetorical jab. Social media, face timing, video calls, and text messages have taken over the charms of meeting your favorite person and talking to them while looking into each other's eyes after a tough day at work. With most of the conversations being tech-centric, we find ourselves more comfortable and confident in phone chats rather than face-to-face interactions.
On the other hand, the silver lining with technology is that it has paved the way for people to connect more easily and broadened the circle of interaction for us to find the right person.
Times were good when people believed in luck and took difficult decisions just because it felt right. The current era is different. We analyze and run calculations and think ahead of ourselves sometimes. It can be the right course of action in many ways, but you have to take that leap of faith when it comes to matters of the heart. The pressure of being a successful and stable person has become so strenuous in the modern world that it has weighed down heavily on most.
Taking unnecessary time
Ironically, we make all the efforts in the hopes of a secure future for ourselves and our family, yet we forget to plant the most important seed to grow the family tree, i.e., finding and choosing a partner. We always back our stance with so-called excuses like stability or not being mentally ready and hide behind them. Another factor is the fear of rejection. Believe it or not, we are vulnerable in expressing our feelings for fear of rejection or not getting the desired validation. Baby Boomers had thicker skin and were brave enough to swallow bitter pills rather than prolong the agony.
Confusing Lust with Love
Unlike the Baby Boomer age, where sex and intimacy were conservative subjects, millennials are more open to conversations about sex and pass fewer judgments on the matter. It can be seen as a positive development but again, when it comes to true love and understanding its meaning, we lost the plot. Terms like "friends with benefits" and "no strings attached" have been in the lexicon and were mended to be called relationships. The sooner we realize that these are temporary affections and hold no value like true love, the better, or we will keep drifting further from sincerity. In the quest to find and nourish your love, we'll have to be more selfless and considerate towards other things such as life goals, family planning, etc.
Lack of family connection
The generation of freedom and independence has seen many changes culturally and socially. We now live in a time where making decisions without consultation or influence is normal. It is indeed a positive change as we can pursue our life’s directions in terms of career, education, and lifestyle. However, it cannot be denied that the family’s concern has lost its value somewhere in between all this. There is a reason why our parents and their parents used to say, "someday, you will thank me for this." Consulting your family members while making relationship decisions is now considered cringy and frowned upon. There is no harm in accepting that our old folks knew better about love and could predict a relationship's future with precision.
Arturo James Daly, a relationship coach and the author of 7 Secrets to what makes love last, intends to provide a helping hand to struggling relationships. This book is a perfect offering to guide you in carrying forward a relationship and maintaining the same spark alive throughout.